Starship Enterprise - The rescue

Starship Enterprise - The rescue
Captain's logStar date 20071126.1847

Starship Enterprise has received an emergency distress signal coming from the deep unknown space surrounding Nebula K25899. The origem of the signal was unidentifiable. Its contents minimal and gloomy: "Please assist. We've abandoned all hope.” The sadness and despair within such short message were overwhelming. Somewhere in the lonely immensities of the cold interstellar vacuum, sentient and intelligent beings were suffering. Assistance was undeniable. The routine mission had to be postponed and the ship's course changed to intercept the source of the transmission that was drifting randomly without control. Speeding up to warp 7, we rushed to the scene, hoping to arrive in time to be of some help. As we got closer, we're able to get a visual of our target, an old and rusty freighter, dangling and wobbling without course. Sensor scan revealed that no danger or risks could arise from them. A tractor beam caught it and brought it closer for inspection. Battered and abused, it had seen better days and surely must have some stories to tell. Laser and torpedo scars marked it from side to side. A name could hardly be read: Kat-Arse. Weird to say the least. Scanning for life forms, we found a signal. Someone was still alive in there. As its life signs got weaker, we've beamed it aboard, directly to sick bay. Shortly after being put on life support, it attempted to speak. The computer registered it and tried to translate promptly: "Fónix! Que ressaca! Nunca mais bebo cristais de dilítio! Alguém tem uma cervejinha gelada? Hey! Quem é aquele tipo de pele verde que está ali a olhar para mim? O gajo existe mesmo? Estás a olhar para quem, ó lagartixa?! Vê lá se te transformo em tapete de casa de banho."